There Was an Old Lady, Who Lived in A…Prius…
I know it’s supposed to be a shoe, but come on. Let’s be real. Shoes are too small for people to live in and the thought of someone making a giant shoe just to live in…well, it seems ridiculous.
To be fair, the old lady I’m talking about doesn’t actually live in a Prius, she just drives it like its a Ferrari. I drive a Honda Insight so I can’t be too hard on her.
I was driving home yesterday when I saw this lady. I approached her at the light in my Insight. In case you don’t know, the insight looks similar to the Prius, only less like an egg. So I pulled up to this light and the lady, who had to be in her seventies, revs her engine at me. I look over, see this tiny woman with her white-grey hair in a bun and think I must have heard wrong. Maybe it was someone else?
The light turns green. Granny stomps on the gas, which lurches the Prius forward and squeals the tires a bit. Not too much, because it probably has the torque of an electronic egg-beater, but enough to hear. Now, at this point I was too much in shock and awe to race her. Nor would I probably have done so anyway. I would only make myself look like an ass whether I lost or won.
The funniest part wasn’t was actually what came next. I witnessed this woman weaving through traffic, cutting off a convertible mustang, honking at a truck the size of a building to move faster, and then shaking her fist at someone who cut her off. All I can say is that little old lady had some attitude (I was going to say balls but the mental image was just too much for me).
So, if you’re ever on the road and you see a little old lady in a Prius. Don’t assume you can just cut her off or that she’ll let you over. She might just get out and cut you. Seriously…don’t do it. Granny is dangerous. She’s like a shriveled ninja.