Muhammed Ali meets Crackhead
You’ve heard about my drives home in previous posts. I think the reason I have so many interesting events happen is because I live in a huge metropolitan city that is now ranked the most diverse in the country. Also, I take the route home that leads me right through town and it’s over an hour drive one way.
There is a guy who I see every day. This guy actually stands on the corner that I turn on to go to my house. I’ll post a picture tomorrow or tonight because I know he’ll be there today flailing his arms wildly.(Never mind…apparently the guy has a whole Facebook fan page with video but no one has ever attempted to talk to him: Epic Boxing Man)
I’m not sure exactly what is up with this guy, but I have to think it’s a combination of mental problems, a boxing history, and possibly drugs. In my great love for you viewers, I might get up the nerve to talk to this guy and get a backstory for a future blog, but I’m not sure I want to go anywhere close to him?
Why, you ask? Well, for hours, and I mean hours he stands on the corner on a busy street and just fights imaginary people. I would call it shadow boxing, but this guy spins and ducks imaginary punches and all kinds of stuff.
If you’ve followed the above link, you know that he is actually dressed pretty decent. He’s not homeless. I once saw him walking to his apartment and even saw him driving a car which was gold, had a bunch of Winnie-The-Pooh stuffed animals in the back and said “Pooh” on the license plate. So this guy not only fights invisible people but also has a pooh fetish. Actually, that didn’t sound right….
Okay, I’ve just made up my mind. I’m going to get an interview with the guy today. You, my loyal followers, are going to get the first-ever interview with this, apparently, famous character. I will probably have to wear headgear when approaching him, but so be it. If you don’t hear from me tomorrow it’s probably because this guy killed me. If that is the case my will blog will reads as follows:
The Hobbler: To my hobbly, bug phobia’d friend I leave all my comments in their entirety. I hope that you enjoy reading them as much as I enjoy posting them.
Benzeknees: To you I leave my keyboard. It has random food particles and probably some hair, but with a good cleaning those should come right out. Also…the tab key sticks a little.
jenn: I leave you my professional headshots I had taken when I was trying out for American Idol. FYI, foot puppetry is apparently not a real thing, not is it worthy of television air time.
and last but not least…
Nifti: To you I give the greatest gift of all, a child’s laughter. I keep him locked up in the shed out back. He enjoys knock knock jokes, riddles, and tickling. The child food is in the bag under the desk.
To everyone else (who I have not forgotten), I leave this ultimate word of wisdom:
“Only confess to it if you are the only other person in the elevator.”